Sh!t My Husband Says

More hilarious head scratching conversations with my husband!

Talking about my upcoming shopping trip in Kelowna:
Me: I really want to find a new pair of boots for the winter.
Him: Your boots are so not good for winter! You need a pair with rubber soles and that can hold up.
Me: You mean Sorels?
Him: Yeah!
*I scrunch up my face*

Folding Isla’s laundry when he comes across her new swimsuit:
Him: I think you need to buy Isla a new swimsuit.
Me: What?? Why?
Him: It looks like a strap fell off!
Me: What? Let me see! *I inspect it and nothing is wrong with the suit* There’s nothing wrong with it. See? It’s a “one shoulder” suit! (There’s a spaghetti strap on one shoulder)
Him: This is going in your “Shit my husband says” blog, isn’t it?
Me: You know it.

After I saw a commercial on TV for diamond rings:
Me: They’re my best friend!
Him: But which would you rather have: A shiny, diamond ring, or your Macbook?
Me: … Macbook! It’s more handy.

I hear him say something from the kitchen right before we went to bed:
Me: What did you say?
Him: I was just saying goodnight to my phone, you know, since it’s in a bed of rice.
(Backstory: Kyle’s phone got some “drool damage” from Isla. She was really cranky while visiting family and chewing on his phone was the only thing that was making her happy. His phone had a good “sleep” and it’s working again.)


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