Category Archives: Dilemmas
14 Weeks and the Gender Debate
I have learned that there are various questions you are asked when people find out that you’re expecting. Number 1 would be the obvious, “When are you due?” Number 2 is, “Are you going to find out what you’re having?” There’s also a third question, “Was it planned?” but I find that question to be rather insensitive and aggravating and shall be left for a different post in the future.
My focus today is the great Gender Debate – or, Question Number 2: Will we or will we not find out what we’re having?
In Canada, or British Columbia where I live, finding out if you’re having a boy or girl can be a crapshoot. Some ultrasound technicians will tell you, some won’t. If you’re a high-risk pregnancy, they’ll tell you. Sometimes, if you pay a little extra $$, they’ll tell you, but maybe that’s just in countries where abortions and infanticide are common because of gender preference. (If you’ve read Secret Daughter, you know what I’m talking about!)
Anyway – the gender knowledge game is what Kyle and I are currently playing. At last week’s doctors appointment an ultrasound was ordered and I’ll be going in around the end of January/beginning of February for my 20/21 Week ultrasound. My doctor also mentioned that we might be able to find out the gender of the baby if we choose. (Might be if the baby is positioned right, etc., etc.)
Here’s the thing – Kyle wants to know what we’re having. I would rather have it be a surprise. This is something we just can’t seem to agree on. Kyle hates surprises and thinks that knowing would be better for planning the baby’s room, picking out clothes, names, etc. (Although we already have a healthy name list already!)
I want it to be a surprise because really, who doesn’t like surprises!? (Other than my husband, obviously) Personally, I think that your first child’s gender should be a surprise. A coworker even made an interesting point: Have the first one be a surprise, and for any kiddos after that, find out so you know whether or not to keep your boy or girl stuff.
I have no idea how we’ll decide who “wins” this debate by the end of January. “Because it’s MY body” is a weak argument, IMO. (As is, “YOU DID THIS TO ME!” while in labour, lol) If anything, we’ll end up dong a round of Rock, Paper, Scissors to settle things.
Regardless of whether or not we find out or not, boy or girl, as long as it’s healthy! (I know, such a horrible cliché.)
Now, onto the regular pregnancy updates:
How far along? 14 weeks – I’m now in my 2nd trimester!
How big is baby? About 3 1/2 inches, or the length of a lemon according to BabyCentre.ca.
Total weight gain/loss: At my appointment last week, the doctor informed me that I have yet to gain any weight, which is normal and nothing to worry about! (Which makes me also wonder where the hell all that food I’ve been consuming has gone!)
Maternity Clothes? None, but it’s getting harding to keep “regular” pants on when I get home. I go right to sweats, yoga pants or pajama pants as soon as I can.
Stretch marks? None!
Sleep: I’m slowly gaining more sleep during the nights, which I’m sure will be ruined when I get bigger. I’ll take what I can get.
Movement: Still nothing …
Food cravings: Nothing that seems out of the ordinary. I’ve really been wanting sushi and Chinese food lately though.
What I miss: Being able to comfortably fit into my favourite pair of jeans. They’re just a little too snug to wear all day.
What I am looking forward to: My ultrasound appointment at the end of January and maternity clothes shopping with my mom in the new year.
Milestones: Hearing the baby’s heartbeat for the second time was absolutely amazing. Kyle got to hear it as well, so that made it extra special! It was a lot easier to find this time than during my first appointment – the doctor found it right away! Last time the little bugger kept moving around and the heartbeat was hard to find. I guess the fact that it’s twice the size now helps too!
Photo:
14 Weeks! I look like I just got out of bed because I just woke up from my post-Christmas breakfast nap!
Now … Questions!
If you have a child – did you find out the gender or not?
If you don’t but eventually plan to – do you want to find out?
Why or why not?
Happy Boxing Day! I hope everyone had a wonderful Christmas!
To Scale or Not To Scale
There’s a certain stigma attached to the weight scale. It tells you that you’re too fat or too thin. It makes you panic and the numbers adjust to what you may or may not weigh. Worst of all, it makes you feel uncomfortable in your own body.
I have lived scale-free for years. When I lived with my dad, he had a scale, but I tried my hardest not to use it. All I feel is paranoia when I step on the scale.
My weight seems to fluctuate around the same mark since I graduated from high school. I’m blessed with good genes and no one in my family is overweight, just big boned thanks to our Chinese heritage (My biceps are abnormally large compared to the rest of my body!). But that scale? I hate it. Kyle’s mom has one and whenever we visit and I always cave and weigh myself.
When I was in high school and played soccer, I weighed around 115lbs. About a year and a half ago I weighed about 127lbs. Sometime around (Canadian) Thanksgiving was the last time I weighed myself, and I think I was somewhere around 123lbs. Today, I have no idea.
Which brings me to the point of this post: Should I buy a scale of my own or should I just “wing” my weight? Part of me says to keep winging it. Part of me says to keep on track and don’t get too crazy since I want to be able to fit my wedding dress properly when I get it altered next week. I also don’t want to exercise and watch what I eat only to have the scale not budge an inch, especially an inch in the wrong direction.
I think the scale only brings more pressure onto ourselves. I believe in the “If it feels good, do it” mantra: I’m going to do what I like and eat what I like, when I feel like it. I also believe that you should take everything in moderation, which is why you won’t catch me doing one-hour workouts at 6:00 a.m. in the morning, or crash dieting on celery, boiled chicken, and egg whites. You will, however, catch me accidentally eating a carb-loaded energy bar after a workout instead of loading up on protein. Live and learn friends, live and learn!
What are your thoughts on weight scales in the house? Are they a demon that glares at you everytime you look their way, or are they a blessing that cheers “Way to go! Only x more pounds to go!”
From now on, I think I’ll answer the question, “How much do you weigh?” with, “Enough to feel good about myself.”
She Writes Words 